Baby Barrage

I have been carrying around a baby shower invite in my purse for several days. I do so because it's the only way for me to remember something so out of my norm, and because it's such a treasure. I don't understand the current rolled-eyes cynicism of women toward baby showers. Granted, the genre could use some livening up. I could personally pass on the mini-diapers with fake baby poo pins that were part of the charm of my last baby shower. Then again, 10 years straight of daily diaper changes has really killed any buzz baby poo may have held for me.
That conceded, baby showers are still wonderful. You have the neophyte mother, her adorable belly squirming with new life. You have the supportive friends, equal parts jealousy and pity. Finally the soon-to-be grandmothers who are happy to be getting a baby without all that labor and delivery. There's cake and ice cream, and hilariously useless gifts. I love these. I love watching the mother who was really hoping for the baby wipe's warmer force a smile as she opens yet another package of receiving blankets. I get a little teary when she tries to seem pleased when that box she was sure was the video monitoring system is really a giant supply of homemade cloth diapers in a dazzling array of cartoon character prints.
Personally, I favor buying gifts for the mother. The baby will get what the baby needs. Babies are notorious for getting their wily little way. Mom though is often neglected. I recommend a basket of stuff for after she gets home from the hospital, or if you are a close friend or relative a small gym bag full of treats for the hospital stay. If you've been through child-birth and it's aftermath, you know what she needs. A quick and easy shower gel and scrubby that can convey some of the comfort of a good soak when you're really just lucky to get wet is helpful. A supply of nutritionally sound cookies for late night nursing is a nice personal touch. A pair of books explicating both the let them holler until they give up method and the give up and take 'em into bed with you method of getting some sleep will meet needs she doesn't know she has. Finally, a sophisticated blank book in which she can safely record some of the darker musings motherhood will inspire may keep past-partum depression from blooming.
To sum up, we can stop rolling our eyes at baby showers because we can also stop creating showers based on male perceptions of the impending event. We don't have to waft around on artificial happiness. We can embrace the savory reality of motherhood, and gift accordingly. Ya-Ya.