Awakenings

In the black of my mind
Golem is thinking.
The weak light awakens Psyche.
First a candle,
Then a flashlight,
Then a floodlamp,
Seeking the Risen Son.
But it is only Golem
Reflecting.

Not a promise, a command

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

I have to admit I am not a receiver. I hate being on the needy end of things. When I come to God, I come for energy and for direction, I don't come for rest. Recently though God has refused to give me anything but rest. I come to Him with questions and problems and ideas and he gives me rest, no answers, no direction, no work. Normally, that wouldn't slow me down terribly because I'd just reach into my own resources and work from there, but lately I've been plumb out of resources. I've had to humble myself and ask for help that I really needed, not help that would have been nice, but help that if it hadn't come I would have been lost. I'm finding it frightening to need other people, to have no back up plan but to ask for help. It's hard not being able to supply my own needs, but at the same time I am finally getting some rest.

I've tended to look at Matthew 11:28-30 as nice promise God made to us, but now I am recognizing that it is a command. There is no qualifier, no pretty please, just the command--"Come unto me." Rest must be far more important than I thought it was, because every effort I am making to come to God, has led me to rest. No work, no direction, no answers, just rest. Instead of the Slough of Despond, I seem to have fallen into the Slough of Hope. Every struggle to get back on the road sinks me deeper, but the deeper I sink the more powerfully I feel the hand holding me up. The more deeply I engage in this rest, the more I discover that I am surrounded by the love of God expressed not merely in His manifest presence, but in His presence in people. The more I rest and accept the love of God as He expresses it through His servants, the more I see how bountiful and beautiful is the work of God in mankind. I am hopeful that as I grow in my appreciation of the work of God in others I will begin to see and value the work of God in me. Maybe it's just trading Bunyan in for Merton, but whatever it is I'll never again undervalue the blessings of obeying the command to come and receive God's rest.

Homeschooling Hurricane

Before

and After...










Could we apply for federal aid? It's been a full quarter. One down, three to go!

Stealing Ideas for Christmas

'Tis the season for catalogs, at least at my house. I prefer the internet and catalog shopping for gifts because with five kids it's much easier to sit in a quiet corner and find the perfect gift within budget then it is to go out to the stores and keep track of totals and balances. As a result my mailbox is very full this year. I thought I'd squeeze out some cheap and easy articles sharing my finds as the stack gains inches.

Domestications

This catalog is a good source of low cost linens and household niceties. I don't recommend it for items that require long term wear, but for seasonal items it's prices can't be beat. I'm thinking of making two investments in Christmas paraphenalia because our home becomes everyone's home over the holidays. I think it's important to create a real holiday feeling that makes this more than just a family gathering. My first potential investment is in a set of holiday china. The Christmas Charm set has caught my eye not only for it's simple beauty, but also for it's reasonable price. Continuing the "Home for Christmas" theme I'd like to start collecting special blankets and sheets for Christmas time. Our little family moves out of the bedrooms and into the basement, so that each nuclear family visiting can have its own room. I'd really like for them to be sleeping under something other than purple butterflies and pink daisies. I think Christmas linens would make for a more "guest room" ambience. There are many versions at Domestications. My favorites are here andhere.

Gooseberry Patch

This catalog has a hand drawn coziness that is wonderful for stirring ideas. While I devour this catalog cover to cover, I have yet to place an order. This year they might finally persuade me though nothing has leapt out at me yet. My favorite idea to steal are these Santa's Little Helper Aprons. All seven children get in the act baking pies on Christmas Adam. My mother-in-law is the family pie expert and she does such a lovely job teaching the kids about pies. I'd love to deck out her little helpers in official helper gear. I'm thinking some green felt and some basic chef's aprons from Sam's Club might be just the ticket. Gooseberry Patch also do a great job suggesting overall themes and offering items to support the themes. My favorite one for this year is their Gingerbread Men. I think that might be just the idea for pulling together Christmas Eve, but Christmas Eve is still brewing away. Finally, I think my family might appreciate a barometer of how I'm handling all this Christmas stress. This apron might be just what they are looking for. :)

Best To You

Best To You has done better for me in the past. I used to find just the right Christmas card and such here, but this year I was just unimpressed. The designs feel rather dated for the most part. The best item of Christmas decor I found was a gilded crown of thorns for the tree top, but it seems they are currently sold out. There was a nice outdoor creche that scratches a long term itch, but I think we'll stick with our light up version for now. The best idea for stealing is the Jesus' stocking ornament. They are out of stock, but that's just fine. I thought their version was rather undersized. I'd like to create a larger version, and begin working on ways to incorporate giving to Jesus into our family's Christmas celebration for everyone. Perhaps we could offer up parts of ourselves we have been holding back, or if that's too abstract for the little ones, maybe we could do something in conjunction with The Most Important Catalog in the World (more about that later). I'd like to see each member of the family set something specific aside as a present for Jesus on his birthday.

The Vermont Country Store

This is my goto catalog for nostalgia gifts. There's always something to make the boomer generation ooh and ahh. While I'm unlikely to purchase a classic tinsel tree I might invest in some old fashioned hard candy that I'm a little too lazy to make. I fell in love with their Mrs. Claus granny gown with matching cap. I still enjoy dress up, and it'd make for cute pictures Christmas morning.

Lillian Vernon

I've spotted a few things for little gifts, so I'll have to be discreet. Let's just say there are lots of items that can be personalized. Definetly worth a look.

Sam's Club Membership Matters

Not to brag, but at my Sam's they just wave me in. I'm there every week, and so I get their catalog. I was very impressed with how many great ideas they had. The most important one I'm planning to steal is decorating the tree with photographs. Last year we all brought special ornaments from our various family trees and created a joint tree. I think this year I'll have everyone bring Christmas pictures from the present and the past. We'll scan them, print them, mount them on red card stock and decorate the tree. Then we can burn all the shared photos to CD so that everyone leaves with a digital photo album that includes special memories of all of us. Yep, Kurt will be in charge of the technical stuff. They had terrific cheese guide that I'll be relying on since fancy cheese isn't on our ordinary menu. I'm thinking that a cheese plate might be a nice foil for all those pies Grandma Vi and her seven helpers will be baking.

Well, I suppose that's more than enough for now. Happy planning!

Christmas Plans

Christmas is coming. I am not one of those people who gripes about Christmas displays in July. I like to plan for Christmas all year round. Christmas and Easter offer times to really immerse yourself in the miracle of God's personal love and attention. It is a powerful opportunity to make every moment a moment of worship and service. I love rituals and I tend to turn any successful idea into a ritual, as a result we have a lot of ready-made Christmas joy to draw on. I'll certainly be looking to select a theme and personalize this particular Christmas, but here are some of the rituals we use to make each Christmas part of the eternal Christmas.
Christmas Adam The day before Christmas Eve is a day of cleaning and preparation. We let go of all the normal concerns that fill up our days and instead focus on the coming blessings. I like to think of it as serving the same kind of purpose the cleaning of leaven out of Jewish homes during the Passover Celebration serves. Our home is transformed into a holy space where God can meet us and bless our time together.
Christmas Eve Boxes A few years ago I bought a set of nesting boxes with a Christmas print on them. We use them to keep the kids busy and on track on Christmas Eve. We start in the morning with something related to breakfast. We've had McDonald's gift certificates, muffin mix and a coupon from Pop-pop for french toast. Then we take care of getting ready for the day with some new toothbrushes and flavored dental floss. The next box is usually a craft that they can make to give to grandparents, and other guests, or that focuses attention on the real meaning of Christmas. Then there is a ticket to lunch or a baking class. We usually have a new Christmas video to watch in one of them. Last year, I made costumes for all the kids and we put together a Christmas play. Toward the end the box becomes about the Christmas story and our family tradition of singing carols and telling family stories about Christmas' past. The last box is always pajamas and bubble bath. I try to sneak a little something in that is surprising. One year I bought PJ's for everyone in the family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, it was fun. Another year I bought Build-A-Bear PJ's for the children's special dolls. The boxes organize the day, and are great for emphasizing the really important things and taking the focus off of the presents.
The Annual Christmas Ornament Every year we purchase a Hallmark ornament for each child and for ourselves as a couple. When it is time to decorate the tree we gather around and line up everyone's ornaments. We go through each year remembering what our family was like "way back when" and rejoicing over each addition as the first ornament for each child comes up in the story. When the children leave the nest, we'll pack up their ornaments and send them off to start making their own families and memories. That thought makes me happy and sad. I hope for at least one or two Christmas' futures we have them bring their old ornaments and the new ones that they've bought for their children so that we can go through the whole gigantic story of us as it is then.
Happy planning, and may your Christmas be truly blessed with the presence of Christ.

Writing 2.0

Written langauge is one of our most ancient technologies, and I believe it's time for an upgrade. For the last several decades a mysterious fog has surrounded the fairly straightforward process of mastering written language. Loud, bitter debates between practicioners of various systems for training new reader/writers have sprung up and wasted tremendous amounts of time and minds. When you step back from all the arguing and simply look at written language it's a fairly simple system of matching sound to letters. I can hear the rumbling from various camps about that "simplification", but the truth is unavoidable. As a piece of technology, writing is very simple. The difficulties that arise are due to the sentimental accretions we've held on to just because Oxford wrote up a dictionary. It is time to look at our phonetic system and standardize spelling and phonemes. It is time for laugh to become laff, phone/fone, etc.
Children are being confused and overwhelmed at the gateway of education, in order to spare lovers of ancient spellings and those who cannot accept the growing distance between this era and the Elizabethan period. We are wasting precious time on learning ancient phonemes and an unnecessarily confusing phonetic system that is now needed for the greater demands placed on the average mind by our information driven society . I love Shakespeare as much if not more as the next person, but I don't think we should hold our children's progress hostage to his spelling--after all he wasn't overly concerned with consistent spelling himself. We need to simpify written language so that learning to read becomes as easy for children as learning to use a computer or a game system. Written language is just another human technology and we need to give it an upgrade.

Turn around

Everytime I turn around time has disappeared. My husband has been out of the country for the last week, so I've been a single parent. I'm so impressed with single-parents. I have no idea how they do it. I do it by relaxing certain rules and deadlines, and getting to be earlier than usual. My time has been well-used, but blogging just didn't fit into the mix without Kurt here to help carry some of the burden. I hope to be back on track soon.