Not a Damn Thing

 I like to think things through, so when I was thinking about having children I invested a lot of time in “what if” scenarios. What if they were ill and died, or got in an accident and died or were supremely selfish and died? What if they did things that hurt me or embarrassed me? What if they were exceptionally wicked? What if everything went wrong and nothing went right? Would I still want to be a mom under those circumstances? Until I was absolutely sure about the answer to that I kept thinking, and in the end I decided I wanted to be a mom no matter what shape that journey would take.

This led to a conversation I have with my children usually around middle school age. I tell them plainly and without reservation that there is not a damn thing they could do that would make me not love them. I walk them through a few possibilities until I’m pretty sure they’ve got it. I’ve been really blessed and things have gone well for me. I am so proud of them and proud to be their mother. But if anything should change, my love won’t.